A week and a half later

I've been home for a week and I honestly don't feel like I had surgery. I've lost thirty pounds. To be fair I gained ten while I was in the hospital and I believe I was retaining quite a bit of fluid when I went into the hospital so a lot of the weight loss may be fluid, but it still feels good to see those numbers on the scale.

My incisions are tiny, less than half an inch each and aside from the occasional itching do not bother me. I have no internal pain and I'm completely off of my narcotic pain killers. I believe I'm doing so well because for once in my life I am focusing on me, taking care of myself and not allowing myself to play second fiddle to everything else going on in my life. I still get tired easily and I am sleeping a lot, but at this point I don't expect any major or even minor complications.

I sit here day after day drinking liquid out of a 1 ounce medicine cup every 15 minutes. If that does not sound like enough to drive someone insane try it for a few hours. If I never see a medicine cup again that will be ok.

I am however going insane from drinking protein shakes. I am not hungry and though I am currently existing on about 300 calories a day, I don't feel hungry, weak, lightheaded or any of the things you would expect from such a drastically restricted diet. It is amazing to me how much of my hunger before really was all in my head.

The problem with the protein is I seem to be developing an aversion to them, they don't bother me, so far my new stomach has tolerated everything, I just don't want them. I long for the day I can take a bite of a chicken breast. I still have ten days to go on this liquid diet and I believe it is going to be a struggle. I'm determined and just need to find things to distract myself.